I want to be authentic in what I do for work, here on my blog and in my cam shows and phone sex. This would not have been possible with previous jobs because, understandably, one is not authentic in all ways at most jobs. But I do want that with what I do now. I wouldn’t have expected to want that when I first got into this kind of work. It was definitely not taught to me. I started out on a fantasy site that used perfect-in-every-way sort of stock photos of girls we were to portray on phone. My mentor, another girl who portrayed one of the fantasy-like girls in the photos on the site often said to me, “you are a fantasy phone girl, nothing more”. And so I was, for many years.
When I branched out from phone sex and started doing cam about six years ago, I came across the website of an indie pornographer who did things in a way that was a far cry from the plastic world of simulated sex that I came from. I would read her blog as often as she would post and I was quickly hooked. I loved how honest she was. How raw her writing was. It was like I was in her head and what she thought, what while she wrote on her blog wasn’t always sexy, but it was always very real sounding and that was more sexy to me than what I had been doing for the many, many years prior to finding her blog.
Very honestly, I do not know how to be that way. I wouldn’t say that I’m the sort of person who cares what other people think. In fact, so many people in my life have told me that I always seem so genuine that it is refreshing… but while I can see where they are coming from, I also know that I am not raw, in the same way the indie pornographer seems to be. I tend to give off to people who I am but only after I’ve carefully examined and refined that in a way that’s acceptable for sharing.
While I’d love to throw out my inner most thoughts for the world to see on my cam sex girl site, I can’t help but worry about what it is that my callers and potential callers truly want to see. Even though I think it would be fun and exciting to be 100% authentic in what I share with my callers, I simply can’t just do it. So, instead, here is my attempt. A few weeks ago, I jotted notes down about my working day. I thought it might be interesting to some of my callers to see what I truly do in one full day (working hours only). Because I made the notes a few weeks ago and haven’t looked at them until now, I can’t go back and make the notes make more sense now. I may do this again and try to be better about getting back to the notes early enough to remember the details. Here the notes are, in the rough format in which I wrote them originally.
A Day in the Life of Lucy:
- (Not on a call or cam, just on my own)… Masturbated to cock sucking/stroke off on face porn. Came in panties.
- Ran ad on backpage
- Quickie phone sex only call. Guy looked at pics of me while he jacked off. Told him about how I came in my panties earlier. Told him I’d like him to cum in my mouth.
- Played Age of Empires (strategy computer based video game) for a few minutes.
- Got text message for non-NiteFlirt site about a show this afternoon. Reminded me I owed some guys emails. Sent emails.
- Played AOE again.
- Got texts from more callers. Responded.
- Played AOE again and more texting.
- Wanker call came in for non-NiteFlirt site. (A “wanker” is a guy who never intended on purchasing time in the first place and instead messes with the cam or phone sex girl for as long as possible before hanging up. Often find I’m on high alert for wankers after getting so many in a row that I’m short and to the point with all potential callers.)
- Called Candy to chat for a bit, but a call came in…
- Cuckold call (more boyfriend who watches me fuck others than typical cuckold call).
- Created and published post on FilthyCall.com and created and published post on my other blog.
- Sent email response about a custom video.
- Cuckold call (playful humiliation).
- Played a little more AOE.
- Got Skype add. Discussed pricing. He didn’t call.
- Talked to Aubrey on the phone.
- Talked to caller. Did boobs only show.
- Did ridiculously hot Skype show.
- Hot as shit tease PLUS heavy extreme BDSM show.
- Did second show with guy who did ridiculously hot show earlier.
- Did submissive phone only call with regular (a dominant caller who has been with me for a bit). It was a role play of going to a wedding, ending up in the bathroom to suck off other guests and finishing off with ass to mouth.
- Had cam show on which I smacked my panty-covered pussy hard and then masturbated. It was a topless show, so he didn’t see my pussy. He came three times!
- Dominant cam to cam show.